Lovehoney's Best Tips for Oral Sex

Oral sex tips to know before you start

Before you dive down under, we’ve got a few general tips that’ll be useful to keep in mind:

• Use a condom or dental dam with a new partner. STDs can be transferred through oral sex, so use protection until you’ve both been tested.
• Everyone has a taste or smell. Don’t make your partner feel uncomfortable about theirs (but do feel comfortable asking that you both wash first).
• Take breaks if you get jaw ache. You can always switch to a toy to keep things going. Or…
• Blend oral with a hand job. Oral sex gets even better when you bring in your hands to help. Use your fingers to follow and intensify your tongue’s movements, for example, or to stroke the shaft or lips while your mouth focuses on teasing the tip or clit.
• Is your partner feeling shy? To take the pressure off, try pleasuring yourself at the same time. Grab a bullet vibe and trace your labia, shaft or balls, slowly turning yourself on while they watch. Then, once you’re both feeling hot, offer to use the vibe to tease them too.
• Try holding eye contact. Looking your partner in the eye as you give them head communicates a sexy confidence.
• Let them know you’re having fun. If moaning feels natural, go for it. Show that you’re enjoying pleasuring your lover by doing what feels right to you. If you prefer to use body language, use your hands to stroke your lover’s thighs and stomach to communicate how into this you are.
• Learn on the job. You’ll get more skilled the more you practice, but every body is different. Stay open to exploring what works best for each person, and…
• Encourage constructive feedback. Only they know what feels amazing to them – so ask them to school you in the art of bringing them to climax. Think of it as a kind of dirty talk; it’s also a new way to get to know each other, and to bring you closer as partners.

Those are the headlines when it comes to oral sex, but there’s more juicy detail down below. So, if you’re looking to surprise your lover with some hot new foreplay skills – or if you’re just looking for sex tips that’ll up your game in general – we’ve got you. Read on…

How to give oral sex to a vulva

Follow this step-by-step guide to giving next-level cunnilingus.

1. Tease all around the vulva

People with vulvas usually take a while to warm up to any kind of sex – so, enjoy building anticipation to help turn them on.

This will stimulate their nerve endings, so they’ll start to feel aroused before you’ve even touched their genitals.

"Variety, multiple simultaneous types of stimulation, and pressure are important!” says a team member here at Lovehoney. Once you’re ready to move onto the vulva, “run your thumbs along the labia before spreading them so you can focus on the most sensitive bits.”

2. Lick upwards

Focus on the vulva’s inner and outer lips first; clitoral stimulation comes later. Use the tip of your tongue to create firm, focused pressure as you lick upwards, across the vaginal opening and up through the centre of the labia. Occasionally flick your tongue from side to side to tease the outer lips.

3. Find the clit

Once you’ve got your lover moaning and you can feel them getting wet (or even wetter!), it’s time to get the clitoris involved.

Check out the diagram above for guidance on where you’ll find it; it’s a pea-sized ‘button’ that sits at the top of the vulva, and is tucked under a little hood of skin.* This hood usually retracts as the clitoris swells and becomes more defined when your lover becomes aroused.

* Well, sort of. That’s the part of the clitoris you can see. The rest is deeper inside the vagina, which is why a combination of internal and external stimulation can feel so good.

1. Start with your hands

Testicles can be a key erogenous zone for some (not all!) people, so try stroking and gently pulling on them to arouse your partner before you reach for the penis. You can also build some sexy tension by kissing the balls, shaft or perineum.

4. Try novel sensations

You can do a lot with your hands and mouth, but sex toys bring a whole new dimension to giving a blowjob. A penis stroker (one that’s open-ended so you can still lick the head) can create breathtaking new sensations, and a cock ring can help your lover to get harder and last longer. (Want to try toys with your partner, but don’t know how to bring it up? Get our tips on how to use sex toys with your lover.)

As well as toys, there are creative ways to use your mouth that some people will love. One member of staff at Lovehoney likes their partner to, "create suction and gently scrape her teeth across the sensitive head at the right moment”. Another is into their lover, “blowing on the wet head between strokes and taking the penis in their mouth”. Ask your partner what they’d like to try, especially before you get your teeth involved.

5. Get consent before you slip in a finger

This boosts blood flow to the area and increases sensitivity, as well as adding a touch of kink!